


Looking for Her

by gxldenskyes



Category: Doctor Who
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-04
Updated: 2020-06-04
Packaged: 2021-03-04 03:21:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,504
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24536917
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gxldenskyes/pseuds/gxldenskyes
Summary: After Doomsday, the Doctor goes looking for the person most important to him.
Relationships: Tenth Doctor/Sarah Jane Smith
Kudos: 15





	Looking for Her

As the Doctor walked into the TARDIS tiredly, he looked around himself. The spaceship felt so empty and after everything he just went through, it felt very quiet too. He walked up to one of the tall pillars, his hand stroking it gently.

"It's just you and me, eh?" The Doctor said softly. He took the hums of the engines as his reply. He chuckled before walking up to the console, his hands in his pockets.

The Doctor looked at the buttons and knobs and levers on the console and sighed softly. He sat at the captain's chair, rubbing his face. He thought about the events he had just experienced. The Daleks, the Cybermen, losing Rose, so many people dead. The Doctor always felt like he was the one to blame, especially for the fact he had now just lost one of the closest people to him. The Doctor then thought about all the people he lost before. He didn't know if he could bear losing anymore.

"Sarah." The Doctor lifted his head. How did he forget about her? His best friend. He had to make sure she was okay. The Doctor jumped out of the captain's chair and immediately started pressing buttons and pulling levers, "Take me to Sarah."

As the TARDIS travelled, the Doctor bit his nails. He just wanted to be with Sarah Jane and know that she was okay. His stomach had turned to knots and he couldn't help but think of the worst.

Finally, the TARDIS landed. The Doctor opened the door and found himself on Bannerman Road, specifically, Sarah Jane's garden. He ran out the TARDIS, shutting the door behind him and running to the front of the house. When he reached the driveway, the Doctor was met with some dead Cybermen on her driveway near her car. He looked to her front door and noticed it was open. As he reached the door, he noticed the glass on the floor.

"Sarah!" The Doctor shouted as he ran through the house. He first went into the living room and then into the kitchen, noticing another dead Cyberman lying on the tiled floor, "Sarah Jane!" He called. His hearts were beating so fast, he thought he was going to have a heart attack. He came back out to the hall, "Sarah!"

He heard footsteps upstairs and he rushed up the steps. As he reached the first floor of the large house, he was met with his Sarah Jane. She was a bit bruised up, a few small cuts on her face and her hair ruffled up. She held her sonic lipstick in her hand and she wore a look on her face that told him she was relieved to see him.

"Sarah." The Doctor said softly.

"Doctor." Sarah Jane said, identical to when they met again at Deffry Vale after so long of being apart.

The both of them rushed up to each other and hugged. They held each other tightly, the Doctor lifting her up from the ground. He was so happy to see her alive and he never wanted to let her go. If he was going to be honest, the Doctor shouldn't have been surprised that Sarah Jane was still alive. He should have known she would have put up some fight.

"Are you alright?" The Doctor broke off the hug and cupped her face, "Oh, you're hurt."

"I'm okay." Sarah Jane chuckled, "They're just a couple little cuts, I'll survive."

"We need to get them cleaned up." The Doctor said, taking her hand in his and turning to go down the stairs.

"Doctor, I'm fine, trust me." Sarah Jane replied, stopping him.

"Sarah, please." The Doctor turned to look at her. She could see the pain in his eyes, "Let me help."

Sarah Jane just simply nodded and the two walked downstairs. As the Doctor raked through her kitchen cupboards for disinfectant, Sarah Jane managed to make a deal with him to get the house cleaned up before he tended to her wounds. So they did.

It was more than difficult as the two dragged the dead Cyberman from the kitchen to the hall. K-9 managed to destroy that Cyberman and the two others outside entirely before they continued cleaning up. The Doctor swept up the glass in the hall as Sarah Jane fixed up the kitchen. It was soon approaching the evening and Sarah Jane came through to the living room as the Doctor sat with K-9, chatting quietly to the robotic dog. She smiled, not really paying attention to the discussion between the two as she sat on the armrest. The Doctor turned to her and smiled.

"Right," The Doctor slapped his thighs before getting up, "Let's have a look at these wounds, shall we?"

"Do you not think we should eat first?" Sarah Jane asked.

"Those cuts will get infected." The Doctor raised an eyebrow.

"And we'll grow hungry, I know which one I'll prefer." Sarah Jane crossed her arms. The Doctor knew he couldn't argue with her.

"Well," The Doctor shrugged, his hands in his pockets, "I wouldn't mind a Chinese."

Sarah Jane chuckled, looking down at her hands. She then looked back up at him as she stood from the armrest, tapping his chest.

"I'll get the menus."

The two ordered their food and soon, they sat on the couch quietly and ate their dinner with K-9 sat near them. The Doctor almost felt human as he enjoyed dinner with Sarah Jane. He wished it could have been like this sometimes. Just every once awhile after all the crazy adventuress. Some tranquility. After dinner, the Doctor finally was able to tend to Sarah Jane's wounds. He dabbed the cuts with cotton wool, Sarah Jane wincing a little.

"Sorry." He smiled.

"It's okay." Sarah Jane replied, "Not your fault."

The Doctor tried another smile but he could feel his guilt about the events that occurred earlier today seep into his mind. As she watched him clean her wounds, Sarah Jane could see the pain in his eyes. She knew as soon as he saw him that Rose was gone and she knew he had been hurt by it.

"How did you fight them off?" The Doctor asked suddenly, "The Cybermen and Daleks I mean."

"I had K-9 with me. I tried gold at first but that was a no-no and then K-9 came out and protected me." Sarah Jane replied, "I only saw one Dalek but it ended up getting whisked away before it could do anything." She looked at him, "That was you, wasn't it? That sent them away?"

The Doctor simply nodded. She watched as he went back to put more disinfectant on the cotton wool and his silence was deafening. Sarah Jane could feel and see the pain he was feeling and she needed to know if he was okay.

"Rose is gone," Sarah Jane began, a pause as she looked at him, "Isn't she?"

"Yes." The Doctor nodded. He looked down for a moment before back at Sarah Jane. He tried a smile, not wanting her to think any less of how he was feeling, "She's with her family though. And Mickey. She's safe."

"What happened?" Sarah Jane asked.

The Doctor paused.

"She was going to be sucked into the void but her dad, Pete... he came back for her and they went into his world."

"I'm sorry."

"Ah, it's alright. She's okay. She'll be okay." The Doctor tried to push his feelings down.

"Will you be able to see her again?"

"No. I won't be able to get through to the parallel world."

Sarah Jane rested her hand on his shoulder, making him lift his head to look at her. She couldn't imagine what it would be like to not be able to see the Doctor again like that. It would have broke her. Sarah Jane could not imagine how Rose was feeling right now.

"She... she loved me, didn't she?" The Doctor asked.

Sarah Jane nodded. Rose never told her but she knew. She could tell. Sarah Jane remembered being like her with the Doctor. She remembered how the Doctor and travelling with him made her feel. It was exhilarating and hard to give up. Sarah Jane knew that Rose would never want to give that up easily.

"She was brilliant." The Doctor grinned. His eyes bubbles with tears, "Everyone was brilliant and I loved them all." The Doctor paused, looking at the cotton wool that sat in his hands, "And I loved her." Sarah Jane couldn't help but feel those words were like a stab in the heart but she couldn't blame him. They were both older now and he had moved on. She had to let him move on, besides, they were always nothing more than just friends. Just best friends, "But not in the same way I love you. Never."

Sarah Jane did not know what to say. She had always loved him (although she didn't realise until she left him) but she never thought he would reciprocate those feelings. Why her of all people? There were so many others he had known so why was she the one he loved.

"What?" She said quietly.

"It was always you." The Doctor cupped her face. His thumbs stroked over her cheeks gently. Sarah Jane studied his face for a moment before he spoke again, "I have always loved you."

"Why are you telling me now?" Sarah Jane asked quietly.

"Because," The Doctor sighed as he bowed his head down, looking at his hands in his palms. He couldn't help but feel nervous telling her this. The Doctor had no idea what Sarah Jane was thinking. He swallowed before looking back to her, "I could have lost you and after seeing you at the school, I couldn't let you go again."

The Doctor looked at Sarah Jane's face and could not read the expression she wore. Was she angry? Was she happy? He wasn't sure but he could feel his stomach turn to knots as he looked at her but before he could say anything, Sarah Jane's lips were on his.

The two kissed for a moment as Sarah Jane held the Doctor's hands. It felt like a relief to finally be like with this with one another after so long. When they broke off the kiss, they looked into each other's eyes. Both of them were speechless if they were honest but Sarah Jane smiled to him. The Doctor smiled back, cupping her face and bringing her lips to his once more.

This kiss was more passionate and that passion grew as they continued. They held onto each other, the Doctor gently pushing Sarah Jane back onto the couch. His hands moved down to the hem of her t-shirt, moving under and touching the sensitive skin of her stomach. Sarah Jane hummed softly as her hands cupped his face. Before they could move on further, K-9's tinny voice spoke to them.

"Master?" K-9 called out.

"What is it, K-9?" The Doctor broke of the kiss, thinking there was something wrong and he had detected some alien activity.

"What are you and Mistress Sarah Jane doing?" K-9 asked.

"I think you know." The Doctor replied before turning to Sarah Jane, the two chuckling before beginning to kiss again.

"Taking part in sexual intercourse." K-9 replied.

The two broke off the kiss in a groan.

"Maybe we should have left the dog in the other room." The Doctor joked.

Sarah Jane chuckled before turning to the robotic dog.

"Have you not got anything you should be doing?" Sarah Jane asked.

"Not necessarily, Mistress."

"Well, could you find something to do?"

"Yes, Mistress." And with that, K-9 trundled out of the living room.

Sarah Jane turned back to look at the Doctor who simply just smiled down at her. He cupped her face as he studied her face. Though he wore a smile, Sarah Jane could not tell what he was thinking.

"What's the matter?" The Doctor asked suddenly, seeing the hesitancy in her eyes.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" Sarah Jane asked, cupping his cheek.

"What do you mean?" He asked with a frown.

"Well, everything you've been through today." Sarah Jane explained, "Is it not too soon?"

"When I saw those Cybermen on your driveway and kitchen, I thought I had lost you too." The Doctor explained, "Now, I have you, I don't want to let you go."

Sarah Jane looked at him for a moment before kissing him once more. Her hands travelled down from his face to the buttons on his suit jacket. She began to undo them, pushing the suit jacket off his shoulders. He shook his arms out of the jacket before chucking it to the side. Sarah Jane's hands were now at his tie, her fingers undoing it. As she undid the tie and threw it to the side, the Doctor took her hands in his, stopping her moving onto the rest of his clothes as he broke off the kiss.

"What is it?" Sarah Jane asked, worried she had did something wrong, "What's wrong?"

"Shall we go upstairs?" The Doctor asked, "It'll be more comfortable."

Sarah Jane started to laugh, kissing his lips softly before making him sit up. She stood up before taking his hand.

"Come on." She smirked.

The two walked out of the living room and were soon kissing again, their backs smashing into various walls until they reached their destination. Sarah Jane shut the door behind them before they continued to strip each other down. They kicked off their shoes before Sarah Jane unbuttoned the Doctor's shirt whilst he lifted her t-shirt over her head. As they both removed their tops, they then moved onto their bottoms, both undoing their buckles and flyers. The two moved to the bed, now in their underwear. The Doctor lifted Sarah Jane up and dropped her onto the bed. She laughed as she landed before the Doctor joined her.

They kissed again as they lay down together, their hands exploring their bodies.

The Doctor moved his hands behind Sarah Jane's back, unclasping her bra. He then kneaded her flesh, kissing the valley between her breasts. Sarah Jane felt like she was floating with the feeling of him touching her like this. It was surreal. Sarah Jane pushed his underwear down and the Doctor kicked them to his side. He then started moving down her body, planting kisses on her skin. Sarah Jane slightly arched her back as he moved closer and closer to his destination. Slowly, the Doctor pulled her underwear down her legs before kissing a path up her body, now level with her.

They kissed once more, Sarah Jane resting her hand on the back of his neck as the Doctor held her thighs, positioning himself in between them. They broke off the kiss, looking at one another for a moment. They knew from just the look they gave each other that they wanted go further and slowly, Sarah Jane moved her hand down his body. Her hand wrapped around his shaft, caressing him gently as his breath hitched. He moved forward slightly, his member pressing into her centre. Gently, he finally buried himself into her entrance.

Sarah Jane wrapped her arms around his neck as she arched her back, a gasp escaping her lips. The Doctor panted, pressing his face into her breasts.

"Oh, Sarah." He said breathlessly. Sarah Jane cupped his face, making him look up to her as she kissed him. They broke off the kiss, the Doctor burying his face into her neck, "You feel so good."

Sarah Jane chuckled breathlessly, turning to look at him.

"So do you." Sarah Jane replied.

The Doctor laughed, kissing her again. As they kissed, he moved his hips slowly. Sarah Jane rocked her hips in a motion that matched his, the two moving as one. They held each other close, Sarah Jane's arms wrapped around his neck whilst the Doctor held her thighs around his waist. As he thrusted, Sarah Jane couldn't believe how amazing the pleasure was. She wasn't sure if it was the fact she had waited so long for this or that he was an alien. Either way, she did not want him to stop. Her nails dug into his shoulders as she guided him into her with each thrust.

The Doctor buried his face into her neck, his rhythm growing faster as he started planting kisses on her neck. Sarah Jane gasped for air as she made space for him to kiss her. They were lost within each other, forgetting everything that happened earlier that day and just enjoyed being with one another. Finally.

The Doctor looked up to her, capturing Sarah Jane's lips in a kiss once more. When they broke off the kiss, the Doctor noticed Sarah Jane was close. As he thrusted, he could see and hear how close to unravelling she was. She clung onto him, almost for dear life.

"Doctor, please." Sarah Jane moaned into his ear.

The Doctor's pace quickened and their moans grew louder. They kissed again as their pleasure grew. The Doctor moved one hand down to centre, rubbing her clit gently. Sarah Jane's breath hitched as her back arched. He continued to thrust into her, bringing her closer and closer to her climax.

Sarah Jane moaned loud as she threw her head back into the pillows, clinging onto his arms tightly as her back arched. Her thighs shook around his body, milking him as he also reached his release.

"Oh, Sarah!" The Doctor exclaimed. His hips jerked as he thrust into her, pressing her clit to make sure she was fully spent. She felt so good as he pumped into her a few more times, unsure of how much he could take in the cradle of her thighs. He collapsed on top of her, the two of them panting and their skin all sticky, "Sarah, Sarah." He said softly as he panted, "My Sarah Jane."

Sarah Jane couldn't help but feel butterflies in her stomach hearing him call her 'his Sarah Jane'. She looked down to him as he looked up. They lazily kissed once more, basking in the afterglow.

The Doctor soon rolled off of her and she went to the bathroom. She soon crawled back into bed with him, curling into his side under the sheets. The Doctor held her close, clearly in his thoughts as he stared into deep space. Sarah Jane looked up to him, resting her hand on his chest.

"Doctor?"

He turned to look at her and smiled. She seemed to look beautiful even with her hair askew and still slightly sweaty. He cupped her face, his thumb stroking over her cheek.

"I was so foolish." The Doctor said quietly, "I should have told you how much I love you all those years ago."

"It's in the past." Sarah Jane replied, "Just be with me now."

The Doctor smiled before leaning forward and kissing her lips lovingly. She then curled back into his side, resting her head on his chest as she listened to his two hearts.

"You still don't wanna come with me?" The Doctor asked, making her lift her head again, "We could go to Florana finally."

Sarah Jane laughed. She looked so beautiful when she laughed.

"We both know it's best if I stay here." Sarah Jane replied, "I could come with you every once in a while. Special occasions and all that but that life isn't for me anymore."

"What will you do?" The Doctor asked, stroking her hair.

"Continue with my life." Sarah Jane sat up, "Plod along with K-9. Save Earth from alien invasions."

The two laughed. The Doctor then sat up against the headboard of the bed. He played with his fingers, unsure of what to say.

"I think you should try and speak to Rose if you can." Sarah Jane said, "Even if it's just a goodbye."

The Doctor nodded. He knew she was right. Finally, he looked back up at her.

"I love you, Sarah Jane." The Doctor said with that wild grin of his, "I love you so much."

"Good thing because," Sarah Jane moved closer to him, her lips centimetres away from his, "I love you too."

The two chuckled as they kissed once more. Sarah Jane then cuddled into him and whilst he stroked her hair, she fell asleep to the sound of his heartbeats. The Doctor watched her as she slept, in awe of her beauty and perseverance. His Sarah Jane had got so smart and she was so proud of her. He kissed the cut above her eyebrow before cuddling into the covers with her. The Doctor wouldn't have known what he would have done if she had been hurt more severely today but right now, he didn't want to think about that. So, he closed his eyes and let himself fall asleep, finally next to his Sarah Jane.


End file.
